Resting Elbows Nearly Prayer. RI Ko. 2007. Translated by Google 2022

 

Resting Elbows Nearly Prayer. RI Ko. 2007

Resting Elbows Nearly Prayer
RI Ko
2007　　　　

1 Hill

The hills in June were refreshing. The wind was so strong that I hit her cheek, but it wasn't cold anymore. A low summer cloud was rising in the sky that opened far to the south. It's the last summer of high school. Tadokoro thought that irreplaceable time would pass. Every time something happened, I came to the hills and hugged something. The hills were such a place. A highway ran under the hills, and a wide forest spread to the west. I couldn't see it from the top of the hill, but there was a house in Tadokoro far away. From autumn to winter in his first year of high school, he was trying to summarize his thoughts while walking in the woods where the leaves had begun to fall. He sometimes walked with his book in his hand. It is one of the series "Literature" edited by Takeo Kuwabara of Iwanami Course, borrowed from the library in the neighboring Midoriin City, and the series of "Philosophy" containing the article by Michitaro Tanaka of the Jimbunshoin. I did.

There were many things I wanted to do in Tadokoro. Life in high school was fulfilling. His science in his first year of high school was biology and earth science. Weather maps were created once or twice in the earth science class. The teacher recorded the weather conditions on NHK in the classroom, listened to them, wrote them in the weather map record field, and actually wrote the weather map. Tadokoro was interested in weather maps. He was particularly interested in how to write isobars. He expressed the subtle swelling and narrowing of the isobars from the records of the jumping observation points, especially by paying attention to the wind direction.

Tadokoro's high school used to be an old junior high school for boys only, and after the war it became co-educated, but there were only 100 girls for 300 boys in the first grade. Therefore, of the eight classes in the first grade, four classes were for men and women, but the remaining four classes were for boys only. Tadokoro became a men's class in the first year, a men's and women's class in the second year, and a men's class again in the third year.

Under the stairs on the first floor in front of the building with the special science classrooms in this old high school, there was a shop that looked like a cave. An old aunt from Tadokoro was sitting there, and when I called out, she took out what I needed. To put it a little over, it felt like a magical store in the story. So she bought a booklet of weather maps that was told by a geoscience teacher. It was thick enough to be worn every day during the summer vacation, and Tadokoro decided to keep a weather map all summer this year and did it. Near dusk every day, Tadokoro brought out a small table in the garden, where she listened to the weather conditions and immediately made a weather map. It was a simple task, but I felt a good sense of accomplishment. She continued this almost every day during the summer vacation. Thanks to that, I was completely used to creating weather maps.

It was true that Tadokoro was interested in isobars, but also because he wanted to be able to draw weather maps when he went to the mountains. Tadokoro liked the mountains. I didn't even try to join the Wandervogel club, but my friend Akagi climbed up every day after school with a heavy rucksack from the first floor to the tower with the music room on the fourth floor. It was true that I was seeing it with some envy.

Tateyama High School was about an 8-minute walk from the south exit of Tateyama City. On the way home from school, when I turned left in front of the south exit of the station, there was a small mountaineering specialty store on the right, selling various things, but there were always no customers. Tadokoro bought a dark blue caravan shoe made of cloth there. It was the first mountaineering equipment I bought. When I climbed Mt. Takaide on an excursion in the fall of the year, I thought Tadokoro was a little over, but I put on these caravan shoes. Looking at Akagi from the Wandervogel club, he didn't even have heels, but he was clearly wearing something that looked like mountain climbing shoes, and he looked mellow. Compared to that, Tadokoro was like a mountain amateur. I had a strong feeling for mountains like this, and I sometimes bought the magazine "Mountains and Valleys" at this mountaineering shop. As with many, the picture on the cover was always wonderful and inspired the mountains.

Tadokoro had come to try what he had come up with. Then he quickly withdrew from what didn't suit him. It also seemed easy to give up. It was from autumn to winter in his first year of high school that he swayed between philosophy and literature forever. Both of them were based on the same strong longing for being deeply involved in one object, the same as when Tadokoro turned his envy to Akagi in the Wandervogel club. He didn't even think that if he made an effort in philosophy and literature, he could achieve great things. Because for him the philosophy was Nietzsche's "Zarastra" and the literature was Kafka's "castle". They showed that they were too holistic, too global, and super-chronological. I didn't think it would be easy to do that, but Tadokoro's heart was strongly attracted to the effort to reach one such far north. In the volume of Nietzsche in the world famous book of the Chuokoron-sha edition, the place facing the dark blue sea was a frontispiece. It was the place Nietzsche pondered. Tadokoro was drawn by the color of the deep sea. I also read Kafka's "Castle" in the Chuokoron-sha edition of world literature. The illustrations drawn in pointillism became one with the content of the novel and impressed him deeply. To the far north of these was to understand the world and to express it. Tadokoro's dream was simple. Tadokoro wanted to be involved in expressing the world, at least for youth, if not for a lifetime. However, how to do it was largely unknown.

The method and longing for this world expression has changed significantly since the end of the first year of high school. Theoretical physics became the object of world understanding and world expression. But this strangeThe change was never abrupt. When Tadokoro was in junior high school, he read Gamow's "One, Two, Three ... Infinity" and was absorbed in the world. What he found most interesting was the story of two companion bugs grabbing inside an apple. The two insects are completely incompatible and avoid instinctively meeting each other. Therefore, the two insects never meet while eating in one apple. In the end, there were two spaces in one apple that never touched each other. I could hardly understand the content of Einstein's theory of relativity, but it was not a deep follow-up. Someday, those specialized things may be done separately. Now it was to choose that direction. What appealed to this choice of physics was the sophistication of the method. Use mathematics and physics to understand and express the world. Its universality unconditionally fascinated Tadokoro's heart. Philosophy and literature are certainly holistic and direct, but Tadokoro was worried about how universal the results would be. Going there, in theoretical physics, everything was clear. At least it seemed to Tadokoro. And this choice hasn't changed since then. However, his mind became uneasy when he could not completely answer any one of the four questions that were asked in the mathematics of the school test, which was conducted for the first time in three years. Is theoretical physics possible in such a state? However, the subject's appeal was sufficient to counteract these anxieties. Hideki Yukawa and Shinichiro Tomonaga were shining. Tadokoro also liked the fact that their faces were in stark contrast. The world of theoretical physics is so wide. How wonderful it is that a completely different personality can shine so much. I hadn't read Shinichiro Tomonaga's book, but Tadokoro was even more impressed by reading the essay collection from Iwanami Shoten written by Hideki Yukawa. Dr. Yukawa entered the world of physics so deeply, and on the other hand, China. A deep understanding is also shown in the classics of. It is possible to practice philosophy while learning physics. However, it seemed difficult to understand physics while doing philosophy. That made Tadokoro greatly move toward the expression of the world of physics. Tadokoro chose to go to Kyoto without hesitation. Many Toshihide gather in the Faculty of Science with only 20 people. Still, there was almost no anxiety. Such difficulties seemed natural to understand the world.

The school trips that took place in March of my second year of high school were in Kyoto and Nara. Tadokoro, along with another aspiring Kyoto aspirant, Kumagai, visited the Institute for Basic Physics in Kyoto during the free tour. The appearance of the laboratory was wonderful. For the two of us, this building was better than any of the famous Kyoto Nara sites. There was a grove in front of the building as I saw in the photo. The gray-white neat building seemed to symbolize their future. Then Tadokoro has been three years old.

In such a situation he came to the hills. The wind that heralded summer was blowing up. Tadokoro once again vowed deeply to spend the last summer of high school.

2 Encounter

Kohei Tadokoro first saw Yoko Muraki when he was passing by Muraki, who pointed to an umbrella, outside the window of the class on the first floor of Tadokoro and others, by the side of the fountain, immediately after entering high school. It was raining finely in spring. I felt that all the scenery had changed around her. She passed by quickly, and then a few busy days passed. Tadokoro met Muraki again during club activities.

Tadokoro was uncertain about choosing a club because of his innate interest, but in the end he chose the track and field club that suits his true personality. Tadokoro unconditionally liked the soil. He could have been called soil or earth, but he loved the feel of stepping on the earth with his feet. That's why he often did handstands and lay down on his abdomen in the school playground for no reason. He liked all the dry soil and the soil after the rain. He had a sweaty body, and as he rested, the wind blew through the school playground. And he carried all the tiredness. Stepping on the soil and cutting the wind didn't seem to be so wonderful.

Tadokoro also liked sprinting, but what he liked the most was the long jump. She set a 400m grade record in the school at a sports festival when Tadokoro was in her first year of middle school. Shortly thereafter, she wasn't hired in the 400m in junior high school. She seemed to be physically overwhelmed by junior high school students. Therefore, the record of 400m in the first year of Tadokoro's junior high school became Tadokoro's forever. It wasn't a shame, but I was happy with Tadokoro and talked to my friends several times after that, but none of them showed much interest, just because they were hmm. That was certainly the case. However, what Tadokoro wanted to convey most was the feel of the earth at that time and the inclination of his body to cut the wind.

However, short distances such as 100m were overwhelmingly fast even in one small junior high school. It was something I couldn't keep up with, no matter how hard I tried. As with all, there was a harsh genius on land. Tadokoro felt that genius was a leap. Even if I jumped with a feeling that I wasn't so serious, that's why I got a good record every time I jumped. The long jump itself, however, had other details, such as the timing of the jump, which was different from the sprint, but Tadokoro was able to enjoy the jump while calculating and correcting it. Tadokoro gave an overwhelming flight distance during the triple jump, such as during a two-class joint boys class in junior high school.

In high school, I decided to focus on the long jump, which was a supporting role when I was in junior high school. Of course, the record is important, but above all, I wanted to regain the feel of the earth and the wind. She found that taking the exam still kept her away from such pure thoughts.

When he applied for the track and field club and participated in the practice in the school playground for the first time, Tadokoro learned that Muraki had joined the track and field club in a year. Tadokoro was a little late to join the club because he was rushing around at the club's choice, but Muraki joined the club immediately without hesitation and was already completely integrated into the club. Muraki was a typical sprint runner. His short hair is breezy every time he runs. The club practice was separate for boys and girls, but only the beginning and end running was done jointly. Tadokoro also thought about sprinting for a moment, but the level of sprinting in high school was even higher. Tadokoro's feet were clearly beyond the scope of his efforts. He was a long jump, but he had good prospects. Of the 20 male members, Tadokoro was the only one who specialized in the long jump in a year. Once he got used to the club, he became friends with Kanai, who was easygoing and cheerful. Kanai specialized in the high jump. Kanai changed from a junior high school straddle roll to a fosbury flop. He said he wanted to take on a new challenge. In this way, the youth of the three began.

3 Committee

By the election of the class representative, Tadokoro became a library committee member. She did so naturally rather than she did. No one is willing to be a member of the class. However, when he came to the library committee as it was, one person recommended Taguchi. When I asked if there was another person, the same recommender was Tadokoro-kun, so two people with similar names became members of the library.

I met Muraki again on the day of the first committee meeting. She was a member of the men's and women's group A election. At that time, she laughed, saying "Oh" to Muraki. This was my third encounter. But of course Muraki doesn't know about the first rainy day.

In the corridor after the committee was disbanded, I was asked, "Mr. Tadokoro, do you like books?"

"I like it, but I've been smoothed out."

"It's impossible to be smoothed"

"It's not impossible, but there were two surnames in the class, so I and Taguchi became."

"I've become myself, because if it's one, I'd prefer the one I like."

"That's true."

"It's wood on duty, I'm on fire. There's no club."

In the track and field club, the practice was on the third day of Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

"Tadokoro is practicing silently."

"Because I'm the only one in the long jump for a year. I often talk to Kanai."

"Kanai had a good record when he was in junior high school."

"It seems. I heard that Mr. Muraki was the same."

"Hmm, a little, but still more."

Like short hair, she speaks straightforwardly.

I came in front of Group F in the men's class. Group A is still ahead.

"Are you going to the summer record meeting?"

"Since I was in high school, it's difficult to jump long."

"It's okay, Tadokoro-kun, you have a good flight time."

I was surprised. She seems to be looking at her jumping place, Tadokoro thought she would see Muraki off.

4 letter

During the summer vacation of the year, Tadokoro wrote a letter to Muraki. After all, the track and field record meeting in July was terrible. The trampling doesn't fit, and of course the record is not good. In addition, my legs became sluggish at the end. In contrast, Muraki was doing well. His short hair was shining in the summer light. Kanai missed the recording session because he sprained his leg a little while practicing at school before the competition. You can make adjustments for the autumn competition.

The practice at school ends in the end of July, and August is a voluntary practice. Each one practiced or took a rest. I could go to a school lodge in Hakuba, Nagano and rent a local elementary school to practice, but that was also free participation. It was a little different from the training camp. The free school spirit appeared in such a place. Tadokoro had issued a notice of participation before the summer vacation, but he was wondering if he might take a break.

Hakuba is the first place to go. It was also attractive as a base for mountaineering, but I didn't like the interruption of summer vacation. The first semester passed in no time. Since it was a two-term system, the report card has not appeared yet. I didn't really care about my grades. I was able to roughly predict the evaluation and ranking.

Tateyama City is a core city in this area, and it is a terminal station where three lines gather, and there are many passengers. From there, Tadokoro took the Ryokuin Line to Mishima, then changed to the Seventh Higher Line and got off at the second Kuranozaki. From there, bike through the fields and woods to get home. Sometimes I walk to Kuranozaki station. In the spring, the bush warblers squealed in the woods, and the lark sang high in the fields. Tadokoro, who was born and raised here, liked this town. And from time to time, or rather every time I had a chance, I went to the Sasaki Hills. This hill, which stretches 11km from east to west, showed the beauty of each of the four seasons. The first encounter with the Tadokoro hills was when his father took him to an amusement park north of the hills to see fireworks. His sister told me the story several times, but Tadokoro himself had no memory.

It seems that it was hard to get back on the bus because I fell asleep completely, but I am grateful to my father who carried me on my back that he often took me with me now.

When I was four or five years old, I became a high school student. He had a strong desire to walk the hills during the summer. Plants, insects and birds grew up, the clouds rose high, and above all, the wind blowing up was refreshing.

Tadokoro wanted to write such a thing in Muraki. I really wanted to write down what I liked, but I couldn't write that much. Such an expression didn't suit Muraki at all. After all, I haven't even said what I saw at the fountain in April. Instead, I wanted to convey the beauty of the hills and forests. This was true. Muraki traveled southeast from Tateyama City on the Nanto Line, changed trains at Sengawara, and lived in Toyama City on the Nao Line. He had heard that he had a small low mountain, but it wasn't like the Sasaki Hills. He wanted to convey the unmistakable beauty of the hills so that he could indirectly convey the feelings of Tadokoro. Tadokoro, who seems nervous and quite optimistic, was the result of serious consideration.

"When I walk through the woods and suddenly come out to a bright field, the mountain massif continues low at the end of the south, and the clouds stand high. I sometimes see pheasants in the field.

From now on, a typhoon will come toward autumn, and the next day you will encounter a beautiful and shining landscape. Do you still go to practice in Hakuba? "

I wrote something that didn't make sense and posted it. He waited for a reply but didn't come.

After all, I participated in Hakuba's practice. Autumn was clearly coming to the elementary school on the plateau, and I thought it was worth it just to know it.

"Thank you for the postcard," Muraki thanked.

When I said, "I was waiting for a reply," I was told that I was sorry that I didn't give it because I thought I would meet in practice soon. After all, Tadokoro thought that indirect expression was useless. "Isn't summer sentimental?"

"That's not the case," Muraki said when he finished the afternoon practice with his bare feet in sandals and his practice shoes. I understand Tadokoro's feelings, but now I don't leave it to the passage of time, there are many things to do, and if I get a reply, Tadokoro thought that it was written like that.

5 lessons

It was the fall of my first year of high school. Schools and clubs were pretty good. Tadokoro was interested in most of the lessons. Speaking of weakness, it was only ancient writing. Only this did not know how to approach the subject and find a relationship, even in the multi-interested Tadokoro. In addition, Jin Konishi's "Ancient Writing Research Method" was bought one by one, and dozens of pages of this were given as tasks, and there were occasional tests. This book was well made, but even with it, it did not awaken the charm of Tadokoro until he entered the world of ancient writing. The Chinese characters themselves were interesting, so they were not as good as the old ones. When I became friends with Kanai and started talking about such classes, I was suddenly told, "You could speak English when you were in junior high school." Kanai's words from another school were abrupt. "I think the name came out in the mock test when I was in junior high school."

I almost forgot about it, but in a wide-area mock test, I was able to speak only English extremely. However, Tadokoro was once again surprised by Kanai's memory, which clearly remembers such a small distant record. In fact, Kanai's performance was outstanding. She was in the same club and class, so the two quickly became friends. Tadokoro often had Kanai teach mathematics. She was in a different class in two years, but in the same class again in three years. The men's class for the last three years has been quite interesting. Seats are free. Extremely speaking, the seats change every day. However, the general position is fixed according to each propensity. Shinozuka of soccer was always studying silently in the seat in front of the window. Tadokoro and Kanai were in the last row, Kanai in the second row from the corridor, and Tadokoro in the third row. You can easily get out of the corridor and it's easy to get in. The last row of the first row on the corridor side is too noisy to go in and out, and there are no desks and chairs there. Therefore, Kanai at the end of the second row is still on the corridor side. Next to that is Tadokoro. It wasn't just easy to get in and out of this seat. There is a trash can right behind. It is convenient because you can immediately throw away the calculation paper that you no longer need. Throw away all the paper you don't need directly from your seat. Sometimes it works, but it goes out quite a bit. Therefore, waste paper is scattered around the trash can. Kanai and Tadokoro are right before that. When there is too much garbage, Tadokoro also pushes it into the trash can, but the trash can is always a pile of garbage so it can't be put in anymore. Sometimes I go to dump the trash outside. Tadokoro likes that kind of thing relatively. No one cleans the classroom. The desk is also bent quite apart. Still, every day is established. Tadokoro himself cleaned it only once immediately after enrollment. The classroom was just to the left of the office. After the class was over, some people cleaned up the hallway, and when it was about to end, a female staff member came from the office and asked me, "What are you doing?" Someone said, "It's clean." I said a little proudly. Subsequent reactions of female staff were shared by everyone on the spot. "Well, I'm cleaning." It was a way of saying that I was clearly seeing a mysterious phenomenon. So everyone was convinced. It's unusual to clean up at this school.

Tadokoro has never cleaned since then. Kanai is probably the same. Maybe Kanai has never done it.

"Kanai, have you ever cleaned it?"

"Hehe, is there a cleansing?" Kanai laughs with joy.

"I remember only once, right after enrollment, you see, Group F, right?"

Classrooms with bare feet were always a little oily. It may have been cleaned by oiling the wooden floor, but I don't know the actual situation. It was very similar to the oil on the floor of an old passenger car with a green shade.

"Kanai, solve this problem."　

The third grade G group was all science, mathematics up to number III, science was physics and chemistry, and society was mostly Japanese history and world history. The classroom is cluttered because there are only men. Occasionally garbage flies over Tadokoro and Kanai to the trash can.

"Do you have a 1000-yen note?" Kanai always calls Tadokoro you.

"why"

"I'll solve this with the watermark on the 1000-yen bill."

I always took off my hat to Kanai.

One day, it was about college.

"Where do you receive it?"

"Kyoto"

"Are you going to receive it with that ability?" Kanai is always frank.

"Worry"

"It's not good, but isn't it impossible with your math?"

"Sure, but I want to receive it."

Certainly the strict thing was strict. However, Tadokoro was also making an effort. In the first semester of the third year, the in-school ability test went up to 20th place in the school at the beginning of the second semester. Kanai is always at number 5 and 6. I hope for chemistry.

In the second semester of the third year, the desks in the classroom were cluttered, but the air in the room was cut off. Garbage sometimes flies in the air, but to put it exaggeratedly, it takes so long that you can hear the paper cutting the wind. Mountains can be seen in the distance outside the window on the third floor. The Takuma River should flow below it, but it cannot be seen from the classroom. The Takuma River also appears in school songs.

"Can you solve this?"

Kanai sent me a notepad. His name was written there as "Kanai Da Yutaka".

Kanai said with a unique smile to Tadokoro, who was confused for a moment.

"Kanai Da, Toyo"

6 Sports festival

In the fall of the year, the first athletic festival is approaching. Eight classes in the first grade are divided into four vertically divided teams, each of which is a team of red, yellow, green, and blue. A new team cheer song is created every year and practiced on the rooftop. You can see the mountains in the distance. The Takuma River flows gently underneath. Great location. Group F such as Tadokoro became a duo with Group A. Muraki was also in it. The main part of the athletic festival was a huge papier-mache three-dimensional wall. Make a core from lumber, put a number of newspapers on it, make a three-dimensional wall, and finally paint it. I usually work on each part underneath, but when I assemble them and start up, I get a wonderful three-dimensional wall surface. This is attached to the four corners of the school playground while coloring the four team colors of red, yellow, green, and blue. A cheering battle is held before that.

We will start building the walls as early as before summer. At first I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm still getting stronger. Without knowing Tadokoro or Kanai well, I pasted the newspaper many times in the designated place.

In this way, the wall is completed, a sports festival is held, four teams compete, and one of them wins. But that's not very important. Everyone is looking forward to the evening festival after that. The wall that was made over half a year is removed and burned in a fire storm made in the middle of the school playground. And the classic song "Burning Quietly" is sung by everyone.

The firestorm in the center is ignited, and the sparks rise high in the night sky. The four teams will enter from their respective locations. There will be a line for men and women to enter.

When I was lining up, Tadokoro and Muraki became a group together. It was just a coincidence. Muraki didn't say anything, so Tadokoro was also stuck. Tadokoro took Muraki's hand when the entrance started. Muraki's hands were cool due to the cold autumn air. Tadokoro thought that he met again. The blaze burned up, and the autumn night sky was spreading above it.

7 Rondo

The school building of Tateyama High School is painted in a dull cream color and is a three-story building with a key shape. There was a music room on the 4th floor only at the bend. Tadokoro chose to play music. Choose from music, art, and crafts. This was decided immediately by Tadokoro. Music, because you don't need any equipment. I bought Koryubungen first. It is a scale practice of vocal music. Tadokoro likes listening to music. But singing and playing are not so much. I played the piano a little since I was in elementary school, and Tadokoro played the organ when I was playing instrumental music in junior high school. She sang as she was a member of the chorus. But that was it.

One of the things that surprised me when I came to high school was that there were quite a few people who could really make music. From great vocal music to choral conducting to piano and stringed instruments, he wondered where he learned that. When Tadokoro was walking around the Sasaki hills, it seems that they were devoted to music. If not, it wouldn't be so good.

In the class when I was in the second year, there was Mr. Saito who was good at playing the flute. I have no choice but to listen to this. The sound of the flute echoed in the classroom where the dirty garbage on the floor after school had accumulated. Koga, who aspires to vocal music, was exceptional. His studies have always been hard work, but his artistic talent is outstanding. When he was two years old, before the summer vacation, he made a nice voice in the classroom. "Oh, I went to the provisional promotion." It is said that during the first year, subjects that had been provisionally certified for two years were successfully accepted. I was happy.

Tadokoro once visited his house. He wasn't inside because he was building his new home. Tadokoro brought him the promised Romain Rolland book.

I don't know what kind of talent the art had. Tadokoro has been a music choice for three years. So he wasn't so surprised to see someone who excels in music.

Classrooms gradually go up to the 1st floor in the 1st year, the 2nd floor in the 2nd year, and the 3rd floor in the 3rd year. In the fall of 2nd year, Tadokoro was looking out the window from the classroom on the second floor during lunch break. Directly below is the key part of the school building, which looks like a courtyard and is made of concrete. A bell that was once used for the start of business is hung there. There were about two classes of two-year-old girls. It wasn't a class, but whether it was over or before the afternoon started, everyone was at their disposal. Some of them seem to be practicing dance, and some of them have started dancing together. Looking at it, Muraki is teaming up with his friend Suwa. They also started dancing. If anything, Muraki was the main, and Mr. Suwa was the recipient. Like the ball scene, where Mr. Suwa raised his hand high and Muraki reached out to Suwa and started dancing. The courtyard looked like a round dance centered around Muraki. Muraki danced mellowly as if there was no gravity. Muraki dances while singing a little, although I couldn't hear the lyrics, which was completely different from the expression that Tadokoro showed in clubs, committees, and conversations. Mr. Suwa is also smiling. The two approached, separated, looked at each other and smiled. Under the groves in the autumn courtyard where the yellow leaves have begun.

Tadokoro thus met some Muraki.

8

Tateyama City is a core city in the region, with the Chuyo Line running almost in the east and west of the center, and the Ryokuin Line and Nanto Line entering there. Tateyama Station has a north exit and a south exit, and the south exit where Tateyama High School is located has developed since ancient times, but after the war the north exit became dominant, and now four department stores are concentrated near the north exit.

There are Chuo-dori, which goes north from the north exit, and Tateyama-dori, which extends east to west to the station. Immediately after exiting the north exit, turn left and follow Tateyama-dori for a while, where you will find Tateyama Shobo. I liked Tadokoro on this street. It's reasonably narrow and reasonably wide, and it's bright and quiet with a certain amount of traffic. It's located on the right side of the street just after leaving the station. It also depends on the fact that there was a third department store on the left. Opposite the third department store, Tateyama Shobo was on the right side of the station. Tadokoro thought that he had a fairly complete collection of books. Immediately after entering, there is a shelf for Iwanami Shinsho, where I have stopped many times.

The fall of the year was deep and the day near winter, Tadokoro picked up a book there. "What is life?" In Iwanami Shinsho. The author was Erwin Schrödinger, a well-known German physicist. The content of the book was to examine the traditional world of biology from physics. In the illustration, what I immediately noticed was a diagram of cell division. The idea was to examine this state of division from the perspective of physics mechanics.

I got a brilliant impression. Is it possible to verify biology with physics? Tadokoro, who stood on the implicit premise that physics targets inanimate objects, seemed to have a faint glimpse of the flexible and greedy inquisitiveness of science. But as he browsed, he felt something was wrong. Of course, it was difficult to point out where and how by the power of Tadokoro. However, it was Tadokoro's intuition that this method was fundamentally different. Iwanami Shinsho was 130 to 150 yen, which wasn't expensive, so I could buy it right away. However, Tadokoro stayed in front of the shelf for a while and did not buy it after all. By that time, I had a strong desire to use physics as a method of world expression rather than philosophy or literature, so I may have been quite innocent about physical methods. I was fascinated by the fact that physics would open up new fields. However, at that time, Tadokoro had the feeling that the method had to be clear in order to do so. Maybe it was the intuition of youth. Tadokoro had a great deal of confidence in that intuition. The new method is chaotic, but it still has to be clear, so Tadokoro thought, and didn't buy the book. But the book clarified my attitude towards physics.

At Tateyama Shobo, I bought a translation at the beginning of the second year. Written by Louis Hémon, translated by Yoshio Yamanouchi, "Maria Chapdelaine", published by Hakusuisha. The rightmost back of the Tateyama Shobo was a shelf for foreign literature. "Maria Chapdelaine" is a work I didn't know at all, and I didn't even know the writer. However, he knew that the name of the translator, Yoshio Yamanouchi, was famous in French literature, so he decided to buy it because of the refreshingness of the title. The content was amazing. The main character, a young woman, experienced various things and recovered and lived while bereavement of her lover. The quiet story of a snow village set in the French colony of Canada ends with finding the center of her heart by accepting the hero's Catholic faith. Tadokoro was overwhelmingly impressed. It seemed to be different from the literary impression. Rather, it was a philosophical impression. In short, it was a conflict between planned harmony and free choice. Tadokoro's understanding seemed to be a conflict between a harmonious and peaceful world based on the Catholic faith and a world striving hard to secure immediate freedom. The priest tells us that one gets true freedom in faith. Although there is a price for human worries and suffering, it was still a free choice to open up a one-time life because it is okay to make a mistake. The hero finally enters the world of faith in planned harmony. It was a world of pure white snow full of tranquility. Tadokoro fully acknowledged the splendor of the world, but he thought he would choose freedom. Tadokoro unconditionally liked the process of trial and error. He wanted to challenge, even if it seemed impossible. Tadokoro thought that freedom was one of the greatest things given to humans. No, it seems to be free at first glance, and even if it is said that it is actually used in regulations that are difficult to notice, it may be so, absolute freedom is impossible for human beings, but it is possible It was Tadokoro's position that it might be possible to live as close as possible.

Tadokoro wondered for a moment what would happen to physics in faith. But this subject naturally disappeared because he was not on the side of faith. Tadokoro, who is very interested, thought that he was glad that he disappeared.

9 school playground

After entering the summer vacation of the second year and finishing the practice of the track and field club, Muraki rarely came to Tadokoro where he was wearing his shoes. When we get together at the library committee, we sometimes talk, but we don't often talk in the school playground.

"Mr. Tadokoro, did you see the summer festival in Tateyama City?"

"The one at the end of July? I haven't seen it."

"I'm not going to see this year, it's just Saturday."

　I was quite surprised. Tadokoro didn't know why he would make such a choice.

"Etsu? Is it okay with me?"

"There is no such person"

That's right, I can't be that kind of person.

Muraki's hair is a little longer than it was in the first year. He is forcing it behind him today.

"Some people saw fireworks last year, so maybe next year I don't feel like that anymore."

That may be true.

"It seems that fireworks will be given at the airfield."

"Yes, it's Tateyama-dori, that area is amazing."

"Would you like to go?"

"Good?"

I'm not sure, but that's fine. She wanted to tell Kanai for a moment, but she stopped.

I liked Tadokoro in the summer school playground. Since the part-time system starts at 5:30, the full-day system is supposed to return by then, but that was not the case. In fact, Tadokoro had left behind in his classroom several times, and he knocked on the entrance during a part-time class with Konkon and brought something left behind from his seat.

The school playground is free when you go there. Part-time physical education classes sometimes start, but in the summer it doesn't feel so uncomfortable even if you stay in the large school playground until after 6 o'clock.

Besides, now that I'm in the summer vacation, the lights are still on in some places, but it was nice to see the school building with the lights from the school playground before the summer vacation and the school playground at the time of the autumn school festival. The liveliness of many young people gathering here seemed wonderful.

10 Summer Festival

The summer festival was really crowded. I promised to meet in front of the north exit ticket gate at 6 pm, but it was full of people getting on and off. Tadokoro went out and waited near the place where he always sells roasted chestnuts on the left. Muraki came just in time.

"Awesome person"

"Yeah, I was surprised."

Go straight out of the north exit and go straight on Tachikawa-dori on the left, and you will come to the end of Tateyama Airfield. Fireworks seem to rise around the edge. Everyone walks there. On the way, Tateyama Shobo is still open, but even with this crowd, there aren't many people inside.

At Tateyama High School, there were no uniforms in particular, and each niece wore free clothes, but even so, things that seemed to be uniforms were naturally made, Tadokoro was usually black school uniforms, and Muraki was also a dark blue uniform. Today, they both dressed like they did at a summer club. Hair is getting shorter again.

"Huh, did you cut your hair?"

"because it's hot"

A little long hair was nice, but I didn't say that. Certainly this is more like the usual Muraki.

"I have something I want Tadokoro to ask."

　Is that so?

"Mr. Tadokoro, you used to make it physical before."

"Yes"

I had spoken on the way back from the library committee. When approaching the airfield, people are walking out of the sidewalk. Not many people return yet, but there are quite a few who carry cotton candy or small rubber balloons with water called bonbons.

"Are you confident?"

"not at all". That's true. However, it is a fact that physics is strict. It's completely different from being able to get close to it. But I can't say it well.

"Are you still okay?"

"I don't mind, but I can't help it because I like it."

I felt like I was telling Muraki, but that's not the problem right now.

"During this time, Kanai told me that your math was impossible."

"Kanai-kun is amazing, I'm sure he was number 5 during this time."

Muraki is probably number 30, which is not much different from Tadokoro.

Near the Tateyama bowling alley, people are crowded and cannot proceed well. When I went to the edge of the airfield site beyond that, it seemed to be a little empty again.

"Why don't you go a little further?"

"Well, it looks like the other side is a little vacant."

There is a railroad crossing, and there is a wire mesh at the airfield beyond that, but today is a festival and it seems that the entrance is open.

"I was hoping for the Faculty of Education, but I came to think that it wasn't really me. My real goal is the piano. Music is fine, but I'm not confident. So I was trying to choose music in the Faculty of Education because it's safer. I thought it was impossible to really major in my music. "

I thought I understood what Muraki wanted to say.

"I've been on land since junior high school and I think that's what I've done, but music has always been by my side since I was younger."

Tadokoro remembered the mellow Muraki who was dancing with Suwa in the courtyard. I have never seen such expressions and gestures on land.

"Do you know Pollini? A young Italian pianist"

"Do not know"

"He said he won a prize in a competition when he was young, but after that he was withdrawn and studying for himself."

"Yes"

"The other day I heard his record for the first time. I was playing Schubert."

　Schubert also knows Tadokoro. I heard "Winter Journey" in the music class during this time as well.

"His Schubert is like a sport, it's a perfect technique, it's more like a sport than an art."

"Sports?"

"Yeah, I don't care about emotions, I feel like I'm perfectly technical, I've warmed up my music all the time, like I'm myself, I know that this is my music other"

"So did you change it?"

"Yes, I have to be loyal to myself, what people think, what I do with this ability, what to do if I fail, I was thinking about that, but listening to Pollini, I am I thought I had to cherish what I was looking for most. "

"I was thinking about expression."

Muraki is listening.

"I want to do what I want to express the most. That's why I don't really care if Kanai tells me. Kanai is the same, Shinozuka is amazing in mathematics. It may be essential. After all, there is a genius. I think. I really think that I'm doing athletics. There are times when I grow up with practice, but heaven is different. But I like athletics, and I like the feel and wind of that earth, so I've continued. . It was impossible if it was only ability. "

What I was saying gradually became incoherent. But Muraki is listening seriously.

"I was in a book, but if you're Muraki-san, which do you take, peace or freedom?"

"What is peace?"

"Faith or something like that"

"It's great if you have faith, but it's impossible, so you have to be free?"

"Freedom is another name for trial and error. I think so. Maybe I'm just failing and I feel regret."

"Physics?"

"There is that, but besides that"

"Thank you, let's move on a little."

I felt that Muraki's expression became a little brighter. But that may be due to the fireworks.

Slowly, slowly, the fireworks made a noise and spread the large flowers all over the sky. And a powerful plosive like the sound of the earth followed.

"Thank you for today, I wanted to talk once."

Thank you, Muraki, for me, it was the best summer.

11 Tradition

It's spring of the second year. The area around the school gate was filled with cherry blossoms, just like when I entered the school. It is said that cherry blossoms have been in this school for a long time. It is an old school that has continued since the Meiji era. There is a gatehouse on the left when facing the inside of the gate. I haven't seen a real gatekeeper in it, but when I'm late on my way home, I sometimes meet the guard and say goodbye. I feel that the gatehouse is still alive.

One of the things that surprised me when I was a freshman last year was that when I entered the school gate in the morning, there was a chair in the center of the wide ground up to the entrance of the school building, and there was a calligraphy on it. It's your birthday. " It happens quite often. The teacher who enters the school gate does not move it, but leaves it as it is. I was a little surprised at first whether it was okay because it didn't get in the way so much, but when I got used to it, I started to wonder if this was this high school.

The teacher never appears at the homeroom time, which is once a week. Students decide what they need and go to report it to the teacher. All the excursions are decided in that way.

When the place is decided, the committee will report to the teacher, and the students will arrange and pay for the bus. That's no problem.

The morning assembly was one of the surprises. It's only once a year, at most twice, but it's done facing the school building in the school playground over the courtyard with a fountain, but no one listens to the teacher.

The teacher is talking something in the distance, but it's noisy and I don't understand. Then, the rolling paper will come down from the windows on the 2nd and 3rd floors of the school building behind. You can read words like "Who is somehow today" or "Who is yours, let's do our best at the athletic festival". The teacher doesn't say anything. Students just look at it and say nothing. A student with a hanging paper is wandering inside the window of the school building. Then the morning assembly is over. It's like it was for hanging paper. Old-fashioned yet perhaps one of the center of the school, passing by the fountain in the courtyard, returning to the classroom. Everyone loves this fountain and the courtyard, prefers the old school building, the music room on the 4th floor is used like an observatory, there is also an old observatory on the roof, and in the physics staircase classroom, it is commonly known as "Go". The chemistry teacher occasionally showed me a trick, and another physics teacher took out the calculation scale from the pocket of the white robe in the middle of the class and calculated it, and experimented every week in the biological room. was there. Mathematics teacher Sato crosses the school playground at dusk and returns to the staff dormitory just south of the school playground. Everyone involved in Tateyama High School loved the free tradition of this school. After a year, Tadokoro understood it well.

12 On the way home

It was rare that Tobita and the way back were together. Tobita is doing shot put in the same track and field club. He always works silently on the menu alone. His tall and solid body is just right for shot put. Tobita doesn't speak much, but that day was different. Maybe it's been two years since we started thinking about various things.

"Do you know that Lysenko was dismissed in the Soviet Union?"

Tobita likes astronomical science and is also in the astronomical department.

"Something like that biological conditioned reflex"

Tadokoro only knows that much.

"Yes, he seems to have been dismissed as the director of the research institute."

"What does that mean?"

Tadokoro has no political background at all.

"It seems that complicated politics is reflected in the world of science."

Tobita speaks very calmly.

"It seems that the times have begun to change drastically."

Even so, Tadokoro can hardly handle it.

"Did anyone talk about the Vietnam War at the speech contest the other day?"

The speech contest is held every year, and a slightly classical yet serious speech is held. Instead, there are many hecklers. At this year's tournament, the third graders certainly talked about the Vietnam War. However, Tadokoro could not fully follow the point. It may be more accurate to say that it doesn't appear much in newspapers, or that it doesn't appear as big as Tadokoro notices.

"What's happening in Vietnam?"

Tadokoro asked without any image coming to mind.

"I don't know well, it just seems like it's in a pretty terrible situation."

"What does it mean to be terrible?"

"It seems that the United States will attack and settle Vietnam, but there is an unexpected counterattack and it seems that it will not end immediately."

Even though it is a war, Tadokoro has almost no image.

"It seems that the beginning was to end soon."

"that is?"

"It seems that the counterattack on the Vietnamese side is continuing, I only know that."

That was the end of the Vietnam story. Both of them have no concrete image. However, Tobita is far more committed to reality.

I'm totally useless, Tadokoro thought it was true. I'm only thinking about studying and my career path.

"I want to do astronomical, but it's tough."

"Is there a small number of people doing it?"

"I can only count, but I'll try it."

The Astronomical Department had an observatory on the roof of the school and had Tobita put it in it before. When I was in elementary school, I was attending a science center and had been to the Mitaka Observatory. It's like making it much smaller.

The great thing about the Astronomical Department is that it has been keeping records of meteorological observations for a long time, and even now, the members are always doing it every day. I don't know when it was recorded, but I've heard that it's scientifically quite valuable.

"It looks like an artificial satellite is supple when flying, but it's sober."

Tadokoro didn't know how sober it was, but only Tobita's strong ambitions were clear. After passing the Agricultural Association Building, turn left at the green table tennis court and you will soon reach the station.

"I'm going to a bookstore for a while"

There were two bookstores at the south exit, and there was a 50-shell bookstore on Suzuran-dori on the way home from school. The other is the Lion Bookstore on South Exit Boulevard.

"Then"

Tadokoro broke up with Tobita and headed straight for the station. As he passed through the underpass of the station, Tadokoro had almost forgotten about Tobita's heavy story. The peaceful crowd was near summer.

13 Music

Muraki told me about the pianist during the summer festival, but Tadokoro most often listened to songs such as The Beatles, PPM (Peter, Paul and Mary), and Taste of Honey. ..

The Beatles' "Michelle" was sung by a junior high school classmate, Yamano, who had a record and traced the traumatic French lyrics on his jacket. I like "La Boheme" in Aznavour, France, because it seems to come to the story. He was fascinated by the expressive power of "Isabel". She has a pianist named Michelangeli and only remembers episodes like canceling a concert. The pianist was surely in the newspaper when he flipped his finger upright, so when she saw it on TV, she was looking at his fingertips, but Tadokoro wasn't sure.

When I went to school in the morning, Tadokoro had a small number of Seventh Higher Schools, so I always stay in the classroom first. All the lyrics of the Beatles song were written on the blackboard in the morning. Perhaps because I mentioned it in a music class, "Oh Danny Boy" was all written. The blackboard in front wasn't enough, and sometimes it was written on the blackboard in the back. I felt it was a waste to erase it, but someone erased it before the start of work. There was a "blackboard" in the poetry collection of Jun Takami who got cancer, and it was written that "I want to erase the blackboard cleanly and leave". Only that act came to my mind when the lyrics were erased.

In the music class, I learned the Japanese lyrics of "Forbidden Play", and I was attracted to the simple and beautiful tune, and I thought that the tone of the guitar was wonderful, but I never wanted to learn it. .. The only good thing about her music selection was that each one sang about the piano next to the teacher and confirmed her part. He told me, "You have a high voice for your height, and you're a tenor." When she is about the height of Tadokoro, she usually has a lot of bass, but she knows that her voice has a unique personality that goes beyond body shape.

The free song of Group G of the 3rd year chorus festival was "Battle of Jericho". I'll probably never forget this English song.　

14 competition

It became a competition in the fall of the second year. The venue is Tateyama City Athletics Stadium. There is a large stadium on the riverbed of the Takuma River in the south of the city. Continuing from last year, Tadokoro and his friends came here. From short to medium distance, I had a long jump in high school, but the reality was harsh. It's not easy to win a prize in this competition that integrates the surrounding high schools. It can be seen that there are so many excellent athletes and they are studying daily.

Tadokoro couldn't make it to the final last year when he was alone. He made his own efforts to create, calculate, and modify menus. Still, I couldn't advance to the final. However, last year there was no choice but to be physically and technically. I couldn't make that excuse anymore this year, and I have no intention of doing so. I went to this competition thinking that if I could do my best, I would be able to stay in the final. I wanted to make it the culmination of club activities in high school. Once this competition is over, there will be no big competition anymore. Tadokoro is not so good, even if there are individual selection competitions. After this competition, he decided to concentrate on his studies.

Kanai probably had the same feelings as Tadokoro. He changed his form in high school and boldly advanced himself into a new situation. It was a Kanai-like choice. He remains in the final last year.

Of course, his ability will remain this year. Tadokoro liked to see the beautiful fosbury flop. He sees Kanai's practice as he takes a rest after finishing his own practice. After the run, his body flutters in the air and clears the bar. How to pull out your legs cleanly. A body that falls slowly. Only his figure dances alone in the school playground approaching in the evening. There are no rankings or prizes. An image of the free act of youth.

However, it is different when it comes to competitions. He will aim for 2nd or 3rd place this year, even if it is difficult to win. That much data is available. Muraki is the same. In terms of data, he will be in the top three in the final. Tobita won the shot put last year.

The audience is only related people, but the tension is high. Everyone is purely aiming to break the record. I like this atmosphere in Tadokoro. The result is cruel. However, it's so obvious that when the competition is over, everyone returns to a relief look. Everything will be adjusted during the winter next year and again set new goals from spring.

The competition goes on in no time. Muraki will advance to the final in 4th place in qualifying. Tobita's shot put is also aimed at winning as planned. Tadokoro didn't make it to the final after all. The result is almost the same as last year. As much as he made an effort, others made an effort. His disappointment that he wanted to stay in the final was sadly strong after the attempt, but now it's gone. I was fascinated by Kanai's high jump. The rest are 3 people, and the 3rd place or less is confirmed. Who will win the championship? The bar goes up and Kanai barely clears in the third attempt. The winning candidate has already been cleared. The remaining one challenges the final attempt.

Take a deep breath and start the run-up, accelerate and take a leap. The last left foot slightly touches the bar. Fall. At this moment, Kanai's second place was confirmed.

Tadokoro looked toward Kanai. Of course Kanai does not notice Tadokoro's line of sight. He has taken a windbreaker and is preparing for an attempt.

Muraki's 100m women's final begins. 6 courses out. It's a good place. It may be her last race. She said she didn't have time before the competition, once she spoke. She was practicing the piano. Still, she did her best to attend this competition. She was watching the practice and it turned out. I'll do my best to do it, because even if the piano is sacrificed, this choice is my own. She said that way.

Her pre-start gesture was natural. She saw this and she liked Tadokoro.

Stand straight at the start position, lower your arms, and slightly deflect the middle fingers of both hands. And it will be in the position as it is. Adjust your hind legs once or twice and the time will stop.

Signals and guns. Acceleration from the start makes the hair flutter. The goal was as if the slender body almost collapsed. A moment in a blink of an eye. 3rd place.

She is breathing on her shoulders with her hands on her knees. She doesn't even move. It's all over. Her hair rests on her cheeks. Only there is stationary. A space that wasn't found anywhere, a space that I first learned about. Goodbye Muraki. Goodbye, only one time.

15 Bright days

Let's go to the post office in the town on a sunny Sunday in autumn. I have no particular business. The air is clear and it feels good, and I don't have to do it at home now. I slept early yesterday and I'm not tired. On a day like this, I ride my bicycle and run slowly. Everything in the landscape is as tired as I am, and everything is in a laid-back autumn. The town is quiet and uncrowded. There are some faint clouds high in the high sky. There is no wind.

I will try to remember as much as I can remember. On autumn holidays, I always ride my bike like this. Feel the wind on your cheeks when you run, and breathe in the clean air.

Two and a half years have passed so quickly, and I have only four months left in high school. The date has certainly passed. November. Perhaps I was spending my autumn holidays like this in the first year and the second year. I've done everything I need to do. So it was fulfilling. So it doesn't mean it's too early. Time did pass, but it included everything it should have included and it was gone.

The wind doesn't come into the soft sweater. The club is almost over. A feeling of faint regret comes to mind for a moment. I could have done more. I could have run more and jumped more. I might have been able to know more about the feel of the soil. I should have focused more on the jumping posture, the swing of the arm, and the movement of the foot. Everything is back in an instant. A moment of touching that sand. The moment when you can clearly see all the results. The sand that rises and the sand that digs into. A body that sinks softly. Everything is back in slow motion now. The run-up at that time, the jumping position at that time. Stepping on at that time. The sky I looked up at. A big breath. Hit your face, hit your thighs, and go. The landscape disappears and everything disappears. The world disappears. You can see only your steps, the feeling of running, and the rhythm of stepping on the ground.

Flying in the sky, my arms cut the sky. The sound disappears. Then the sand and the world return, and you can hear the buzz. The attempt is over.

The leap was youth. I won't go back there anymore. I can't go home. Just as time doesn't come back.

I liked Yugure's school playground. I liked the moment when all of that was madder red. All movements slow down as the shadows extend into the school playground. I don't know why. Maybe the day is over. Give a moment of peace before everything is done. Someone sends a message saying that something beyond humans was good. After all, there was no other day today. I loosened my body, ran, timed, repeated the image of jumping, checked the springboards, cleaned the sandbox, and jumped.

To cut the world. For myself to run in the world. To tell you that I was there. Because it's nothing. Just to jump. Just to be.

Turn left on the Ryokuin Kaido, go north on the Hiyoshi Kaido, and turn right again. The old milk collection area is still in the old days. Leave the nostalgic scenery. Once many people worked, factories went live, milk was made and yogurt was made. There was always a white coat work clothes. It's quiet now. I'm sure that only the collection is done, but I can't see any figures. I've seen this landscape since I was in elementary school. Only here is left out of time. Nostalgic self.

You can see the hills. Oh, that's right. Was it today? The hills are quiet but brilliant in the autumn light. Along with the golden color. In the clear air of the high sky, there is no wind, yet you can play music.

One autumn day, only one day, the hills shine brightly. Show the true picture for only one day. I don't notice until I see it. That today is that day.

Tadokoro stops his bicycle and looks at the hills. Yes, always. You always appear in front of me like this. To tell you about autumn. To tell you that you have lived until autumn. To tell that the world is shining.

16 "In the evening" and "Why"

Mr. Muraki talked about Pollini in the summer, but I didn't really understand anything at that time. I only listened to the Beatles Michelle. I chose music, but I calculated the number of long jump steps at my desk. But I was happy to talk to me. I haven't forgotten that. I wrote the letter today because I listened to Backhaus's piano on FM last night. The performance was great, but I thought so, but I was impressed by the way Backhaus lived. When I was playing Beethoven's song at a concert, I got sick and said, "Please rest a little," and when I interrupted and resumed, I don't have the power to pull Beethoven anymore. I asked him to play a different song, and he played two Schumann songs. It's a short song, one is "evening" and the other is "why". That is the end of this concert. Backhaus will die two weeks later. It was a great song. The sounds were jumping, and I felt that each one was floating in the air. I've never felt like this. I wanted to convey that. There was only a sloppy answer.

17 Rugby

From the second semester of the third year, PE classes are completely free. I'm glad I did my favorite event. Tadokoro chose rugby. He did all the stuff in three years. Because my body is stiff and clumsy, mechanical exercises such as mats were the worst. Kendo looks cool from the outside, but I learned that it's really difficult. First, when his face became itchy, he tried to scratch it, but he was frustrated that his face was in the way and he couldn't scratch it. His legs are slippery, so if he did it faithfully, he would make big beans and it would hurt. In addition, when I did it with Miyajima of the Kendo club in practice, it was so painful that my head was numb for a while because it had a mask on it and it got into the back of my head. This is the launch of Kendo and has never been done since. It was kind of cool to do judo in the martial arts room, but it was totally bad to play against Shida. Because it's a judo club, my body is big and I can't move at all. While moving from side to side, his foot was hung on him and he floated in a moment and was knocked down. There is nothing but wonderful. This stopped judo. I can't do it very much. No other indoor competitions. I liked the soil. Everyone played tennis quite a bit, but I felt cramped that the court was in the corner of the school playground, so I never played it. The school playground was soccer or rugby, but before I knew it, everyone was playing rugby. This was unconditionally fun after all. Tadokoro was quick, agile, and familiar with the school playground on land, so it was like his own garden. Besides, the sky from autumn to winter is good. Keane and clear and cold, you can forget everything.

So from the fall of the third year, I was most looking forward to physical education. So did everyone. It wasn't a rush, but it was serious, it ran desperately, it caught desperately, and it desperately formed a scrum. Gym clothes have become shabby. The back pocket was grabbed and removed. Scrums and grips also made the knees fragile. Still, it's really fun to run. Tadokoro was a little thin, so he didn't go into scrum and continued to run exclusively in the forward direction. Touched down again and again. That feel. I will probably never forget this too.

When physical education begins, I first make 5 or 6 laps around the school playground as a preparatory exercise. Run seriously, not jogging. At that time, Tadokoro and Kumagai are always at the top of the last corner. Kumagai is a table tennis club and has fast legs. He will play the final match with him. Tadokoro always wins and Kumagai regrets. It was fun.

At one point, in the middle of rugby, I was in the middle of the school playground, and when I looked toward the school building, Muraki and Suwa were standing on the edge of the school playground and looking at me. I'm not looking at Tadokoro separately. Seems to be looking at the whole rugby. Physical education lasted for two hours, so during the break, physical education continued as it was. It seems that the two were out during the break. When Tadokoro raised his hand and shook it a lot, it seemed to be understood, and the two of us met for a moment, and then I said something, but I couldn't hear it. He put his hand on his mouth and told me again. Good luck! Then they went back to the school building.

18 Final test

At the beginning of the year, time was too fast. The buzz disappeared from the classroom. The classroom is still messy, but the garbage is no longer flying in the air. Each one started a game in the individual world. I feel like that. Kanai and Tadokoro are lined up in the same final row, but even that Kanai sometimes shows a sharp expression. Even so, I immediately returned to my usual expression and spoke to Tadokoro before the English time.

"Why don't you come to me when the entrance exam is over? It's much more urban than you are. Only in front of the station."

Tadokoro has never been to Kanai. Kanai, of course, has never been to Tadokoro. Kanai lives in Shino, the second line from Tateyama to Chuyo. He said before that he would walk a little from the station.

"Thank you, I want to go too."

"You're not much different, though."

Kanai laughed as he saw it during the year, on a light rainy day, when Tadokoro wore boots and went to school.

"You shouldn't do that, this isn't a mountain."

Tadokoro likes boots, and when it rained a little, he often wore boots from the front. It was practical because there were still dirt roads left here and there. After high school, I learned that most things don't wear boots even in the rain.

"Obviously, that kind of thing, you, are you all day long?"

Certainly, I'm in the classroom with my shoes on, so I'm a little sick.

"If you look like that, you'll get a good reputation."

"I like boots."

"Don't like it, I'm afraid"

I had said such a thing. She was happy to meet Kanai. Of course I never said that, but without him, Tadokoro's school life would have changed considerably.

"Are you going to Kyoto?"

"Because I haven't got on the Shinkansen yet."

Kanai will take the exam in Tokyo.

"It's a city fall to the end"

"Okay, will Kyoto come if you accept it?"

"If you accept it"

I laugh with that peculiar expression, but I don't laugh anymore.

みな真剣になった。来週からは高校最後の最終試験が始まる。内申は、このクラスではほとんど気にするものはいない。みな実力で受験する。推薦も多分受けない。少なくとも友達でそうした話は聞いたことがない。学校は二期制だから、十月でもう成績は確定している。気にするとしたら、欠席時数だけだ。これはみんなが少しずつ傷を持っている。適当にサボって図書館に行って勉強するのがよくあった。学校の図書館ではない。市内の市立図書館だ。秋の中ごろ、金井と二人で、午後から市立立山図書館に行って、教室に戻ってくると、まったくめずらしく担任の先生がいた。図書館に行っていました、と伝えると、そうか、それだけだった。先生は簡単な連絡のために教室に来ただけで、特にホームルームがあったわけではなかった。そんなふうに、みな適当に授業を抜けることがある。それで欠席時数だけは注意している。

それでも、最終試験には、みななにか感傷的になっている。これですべての試験が終わる。もう高校に来ない。高校が終わる。ほんとうに終わるのだ。卒業ではない。高校が終わる。あのばかげた日々が消える。すべてのこのクラスから消える。きたないゴミももう飛ばない。窓から大きな声でなにか校庭に向かって叫んだ日は来ない。最終試験ですべてが終わる。古めかしい校舎、きたない床、ついに一度も金井がそうじをしなかった日々。村木が走り、金井が跳び、田所が逆立ちをした校庭。佐藤先生がやや猫背に足早に官舎に帰っていった、長い影の夕暮れ。

さようなら、高校、さようなら、図書室、さようなら、冬のストーブ、その暖かさと静けさ。

１９　雪のホーム

After the final exam, the school was free to attend. Everyone stayed at home and it was the last concentration. Tadokoro put all his energy into chemistry and Japanese history, which were rather thin. I also checked the statistics of number III just in case. Chemistry is a complex organic matter, and Japanese history has been around since modern times. He read the philosopher Russell's essay in English. In the evening, everyone rushes home. This is to listen to the radio in my living room. Somehow I associated the winter of London and the winter of England. The times have changed with radio. Was there such an era?

The morning when I tried to get the last document I had asked for from the school office, when I woke up, it was snowing all over. The snow was falling, however. Let's put on our boots, we won't meet Kanai. The warmth of the felt in the boots is good. It's similar to my way of life. From the green shade line to the inside of the Seventh Higher Line. Bicycles are tight today. Let's walk to the station.

I bought a dark blue trench coat in Tateyama city in the winter of the second year. You don't have to be Kanai to laugh at this boots. I'm sick. As you pass through the woods, snow falls off the branches. After all it is impossible unless it is boots. I want to show Kanai the beauty of the forest in late spring. White flowers on the ego tree are scattered silently in the woods, breathtakingly fantastic. I want to show him such a landscape. Where did I grow up and why did I wear boots?

The school was quiet. The office is doing. The 12th grade is in class. I checked the documents and tried to leave the school gate. There I was in Muraki. Muraki also had a business.

"Is Tadokoro also a document?"

"Yeah, from now on?"

"Yes"

"Then I'm waiting"

I wonder if this is the last encounter, I may not meet anymore. I didn't say the day I saw it for the first time.

The snow has almost stopped. When I look up, I flutter down. After all there is a lot of snow, I think so. There is snow shoveling around the school gate. Snow is piled up on the round roof of the gatehouse. On the day when I was late at the club, I went out to the school gate from the passage near the gatehouse. I remembered that.

"Sorry, it's late"

"Okay, I saw the snow."

"I often returned from here."

I pointed to the gatekeeper.

"It was a club, we were there too."

Return to the station on the school road. The place I always walked looks completely new with snow.

"When it snowed last year, it was the physics of our staircase classroom. Then he canceled the class."

Muraki doesn't say anything.

"That's why we all had a snowball fight in front of the shop. We also had other classes."

"I didn't get together in class."

　The usual agricultural association building. If you turn, it's a station.

"I've seen Mr. Muraki when he and Mr. Suwa came down to the underpass from the Nanto Line, I was talking about something."

"Mr. Suwa is always like that."

"Mr. Muraki was also talking."

If you go through the ticket gate and go down to the underpass, you will soon be on the Nanto Line.

"I'm going to the Nanto Line platform, I haven't come yet."

It's the first time for me to do this.

The sky is bright when I go home. The snow has stopped. The train is already here, because this is the first train.

"I'm listening to Lipatti, a pianist, who is simple but can't beat anyone, like that."

It's a name I don't know. I can't say anything.

I saw this when I got on the train. The window glass is cloudy.

The train curves gently to the right. Tadokoro waved his hand. I may not meet you anymore. Tadokoro stretched out his hand and shook his hand. To the invisible Muraki.

Near spring 20

I'm thinking of writing a letter, and I'm sorry I'm so late. I don't think three years have passed. I now think that I might have been able to talk more. I'm sure I'll live normally, unlike Tadokoro-san. I thought that even if I had it, I wouldn't feel it if I didn't do it. Thank you for the snowy day, I was watching from my madness, I would have been waving all the time.

Tadokoro wanted to call Muraki for the first time. He has never done that. I could meet him anytime. In the same world, at least in the same space.

Muraki answered the phone.

"Thank you for the letter," he said. I really wanted to say that I would meet in April. But I didn't say it. I couldn't say that, even to myself.

Everything will change from April. Words, thoughts, time, the world.

If it doesn't change, and if something that doesn't really change is born, we may meet. When I meet, I will tell .

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